Welcome one and all- Please leave sanity at the door

A Teenage boy with a passion for all things nerdy! Expect a lot of Doctor Who, Cult/Horror Movies, Literature and Novels, History, Comic Books and random thoughts. Posts published weekly on a Friday evening. DISCLAIMER: I do not own any of the items reviewed on this site and i also do not own of the pictures (unless stated so). If you own one of the photos and wish for it to be removed contact me at this adress: Super.pig@live.co.uk. However all of the written work is my own and is protected under copyright law.

Saturday, 22 October 2011

The Incredible Melting Man (1977)

For any lovers of 1970’s B movies, this film is a definite must. Requested by Lenny of Dancing with Architecture, The Incredible Melting Man is like three different slices of cake together on the same plate. The first is a very cheesy cheesecake, the second is a bland and boring sponge and the third is a strong incredibly dark and rich-chocolate cake. In case my rather ridiculous metaphor is confusing to some; the first part of the film is pure 1970’s nonsense, the middle a little bit boring and the ending is bleak and fantastically dark. I will try something a little bit different and work the review through each section.

Wednesday, 14 September 2011

The Mutations (1974)

Requested by my friend Shaun, from The Celluloid Highway ( a blog I suggest you go and read if you have not already) and one of this sites thirteen followers ( I know I’ve hit the big time), The Mutations is a film largely know for two reasons. 1) It features a pre-Doctor Who Tom Baker covered in prosthetics and 2) the “Freaks” are played by real deformed actors. Overall it’s a pretty enjoyable little piece, with a good pace and enough cheese to merit a second viewing.

Thursday, 18 August 2011

Apologies and choose a film for me to review

I suppose I owe anybody who reads this blog an apology. I went on my yearly Holiday to egypt being told that there was a Wireless connection-there was not. So yet again the blog went for quite some time without anything being posted. There is however some good news. In a week or so I will be seeing (unless im struck by lightning) the following list of classic horror goodness:
Basket Case (1982)
The Mutations (1974)
Doomwatch (1972)
The Incredible Melting Man (1977)
Bride of Re-Animator (1992)
House of a Thousand Dolls (1969)

So choose a film or two! If no one replys I'll just pick them myself-they will probably all be reviewed at somepoint anyway

Thursday, 28 July 2011

Holocaust 2000: Michael Robson

To start with I will warn that there a probably some spoilers in this review. I honestly do not know whether the film Holocaust 2000 came before the book, however since the film was released in 1977 and my copy of the book states that it was first published in ’78 I can assume that the film came first. I do know that the book was published twice, once with a film tie in cover and secondly with a different cover that only alludes to film by stating “also a nerve twisting film starring Kirk Douglas”. The film, one of the infamous “spaghetti rip-offs” of the 1970’s, attempted to cash in on the success of The Omen (I’ve gone on about it enough you should know every detail about this film now but if you don’t it’s from 1976). The cover of the novel seems to acknowledge this by stating “more ominous than the omen”. The book addresses similar themes and issues but I found it to be more of a political thriller than a religious horror.
The blurb states; The construction of a huge thermonuclear plan in a small Arab state was Robert Caine’s most dearly cherishes ambition. But even he was appalled at the state of bizarre and bloody deaths that plagued every step of the project. It began to look as though supernatural forces were warning Robert off the scheme. But it took a catholic Priest to show him the full implications of his plan- implications too horrific for the human mind to bear...

Thursday, 21 July 2011

Jason X (2001)

Oh dear. If there ever was a franchise that ran itself dry it has to be Friday The 13th. The originals whilst some of the best slashers to come out of the 1980’s didn’t really give much for various sequels to expand on. So later on in the franchise we ended up getting more and more equally ridiculous ideas. These included psychic powers (Friday The 13th part VII: The New Blood), taking Jason to the city (Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan), having his spirit jump from body to body (Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday) and then this little number. Sadly the filmmakers did not seem to realise that the reason the originals were the best were because they stuck to a formulae by not bringing in such ridiculous gimmicks. They could still of had the same sort of movies just added more character if they wanted to expand the stories (although I can’t think of anyone who would watch a Friday the 13th film for the story). Perhaps turn Tommy Jarvis into a Loomis type character?

Thursday, 14 July 2011

You Tube Terrors: MadMan Marz

To Fan films and Homemade Horror Movies are something I absolutely adore. A lot of the time these fan films concentrate on the larger horror franchises such as A Nightmare on Elm Street, Halloween and Friday The 13th, however it’s really a pleasure when you find a fan film that concentrates on a smaller less appreciated film. Madman from 1981 is a pretty well known slahser and since its killer would be pretty simple to re-create it’s hard to believe the fan film base hasn’t capitalised on Madman before. When I found this little beauty however I was blown away. “Madman Marz” is a fan made trailer for an ideal sequel to the original film. A hell of a lot of work has been put into this and it’s fantastic that it was included on the Madman Thirtieth Anniversary DVD.

Thursday, 7 July 2011

Scream (1996)

I had long been avoiding the original Scream because of its marmite reputation (you either love it or hate it); the release of the fourth film in the franchise however gave me enough reason to finally view the film that saved horror for the 90’s. To sum up my opinion in four words I chose- funny, witty, dramatic and scary. You see folks I am one of the scream lovers and if you don’t like it then stop reading now, this review is to be mostly praise. (By the way this review contains some spoilers so if you haven’t seen the film you want to stop reading now)

Tuesday, 21 June 2011

Children Of The Corn II: The Final Sacrifice (1992)

Yes this movie is terrible. Yes the plot is incoherent. Yes it’s got all the hall marks of a bad 1990’s B-movie. So why then, is it so bloody enjoyable? For entertainment levels alone this film succeeds the original eighty four Children of the Corn that I reviewed the other week. Personally though I think it’s unfair to compare the two however as they are both of a completely different style. The original went for a dark and sinister look, concentrating on building atmosphere. COTC2 goes for lots of action, dark comedy- it’s like a spoof not a sequel! I often think that the producers realised that they couldn’t compete with the original without simply making it a rehash so they decided to just have as much fun as possible.

Wednesday, 15 June 2011

A Tribute to Richard Johnson

Born in good old England like my previous “tribute” actor Richard Johnson is best known among horror fans for his role as Doctor David Menard in the 1979 classic Zombie Flesh Eaters (or Zombie or Zombie 2 etc, etc) and as another Doctor, Doctor Markway in The Haunting (1963) but his work in the horror genre is much more than these two films.

His first venture into the wonder full world of horror movies is the above mentioned The Haunting. Often called the best haunted house or ghost movie of all time it’s subtle little chiller that puts shame to the big budget remake. Johnson plays the head of a group investigating the paranormal and he plays the role perfectly.

His next role in the horror world was in The Witch (1966) in which he had the staring role. In this he plays a young historian who is payed to organise a widows collection of erotic writings that belonged to her late husband. The film does not have great reputation and one cannot help but wonder that if the film had done better Johnson would have been given more horror roles since here he plays the main role.

It would be eight years until his next horror role in 1974’s Beyond The Door, an Italian knock off of The Exorcist (1973). In this he played Dimmittri a Satanist who discovered the error of his ways in the films climax. Then in 1975 came The Night Child often classed as a exorcist rip off but having not seen the film myself I have heard it is very different. A smaller role featured three years later in Pete Walkers, The Comeback.

Island Of The Fishmen followed in 1979, in which Johnson played a mad scientist role similar to that of Dr Menard (im coming to that in a second). The film was more sci-fi adventure than horror realy but when released in america on video in the 80’s was retitled screamers and had a new prologue shot with extra gore. Once again a superb Johnson preformance helped carry the film.

My personal favourite of all of Johnsons horror roles however (and probably his best known) occured in the same year as Island Of The Fishmen and is of course Dr Menard from Zombie Flesh Eaters aka Zombi 2 aka Lucio Fulci’s Zombie. Menard would of been without doubt a hard character to play. The audience never realy knows whther he is hero or villain. Johnson however makes sure that when Menard needs to be sympathised with that the audeince does just that, and when he needs to be feared likewise. The preformance is incredbly powerfull as Menard is also shown to act as if he is on another planet at some points, grumblingand muttering with large pauses in his speech however his actions towards his wife tell a darker story.

A few other horror roles followed in both movies and tv but nothing could top Zombie, Johnson is still working today and I for one hope that he will make a return to the genre so that he can widen his horror legacy.

Tuesday, 7 June 2011

Children Of The Corn (1984)

Like The Amityville Horror (1979) and the Howling (1980) one of the reasons Children Of The Corn is remembered is because of its seemingly endless amount of sequels. Now The Howling and Amityville were pretty good films on their own (well that’s the majority of the opinion I don’t rate Amityville that much). What about Children though? It often seems to be remembered as one of the greats. Now I wouldn’t go as far as to call it a great as it’s not without its problems but it is pretty descent.

Saturday, 5 March 2011

Petrifying Posters: The Exorcist (1973)

To me and fellow horror fans of the same age, The Exorcist has become legend. It’s the kind of movie your parents will always talk about if you mention horror films. So when I finally got the courage to watch it I can’t help but say I was slightly disappointed. It’s a good horror film. It’s a very good horror film and it is very scary. However I can’t help but think it is slightly over rated, no doubt due to its phenomenal special effects that must have been revolutionary. One thing I loved about the film though was it’s incredible cinematography and the lasting images it plants in the viewers mind.

If there ever was a lasting image, it’s the one used on the films poster. In fact it has almost become the calling card for the Exorcist having been used on almost every single DVD release and merchandise related to the movie. I even found an image of a bloke with a tattoo of this on Google! The shot that inspires this iconic image lasts for only a few seconds in the film. They are memorable seconds though. The image convinces the viewer (poster or film) that the priest pictured is about to enter some strange evil world. What’s even more haunting is that this evil world is inside an ordinary house. Though this the poster manages to sum up the film, evil can take refuge anywhere.

Friday, 25 February 2011

The Fog (2005)

Remakes are generally annoying, so when it’s a remake of a film you personally admire and respect, it’s twice as annoying. I had the above experience with the film I am reviewing now, which is of course a remake of John Carpenter’s original from 1980. Now one could say a good remake (if there is such a thing) is one that keeps the style and tone of the original but presents new ideas and updates the classic tale for a new audience. Now this remake does tick two of those boxes, it presents new ideas and it updates it for a modern audience. However this film has one major flaw, aside from maybe producers Debra Hill and John Carpenter, nobody seems to give a damn about this film or the original.

Friday, 11 February 2011

Silent Night, Bloody Night (1974)

Often forgotten in favour of another Christmas themed slasher from the same year, Bob Clarkes Black Christmas (1974), SNBN is not actually that bad. Its plot is certainly a lot juicier than Black Christmases and the twist was actually a genuine surprise for me. (By the way if you’re going to view this please don’t continue reading)

Tuesday, 1 February 2011

Petrifying Posters: The Terrornauts (1967)

If a film is so cheaply made that it cannot afford a big brash marketing campaign then it is often up to the movies poster to sell that movie to the public. Sometimes a great poster is forgotten because the film is so bad, or because the movie was forgettable.

Today’s poster is a mixture of both. The Terrornauts is a 1967 amicus science fiction film and an incredibly cheap one at that. It hardly seems deserving of the fantastic poster given to it which is connected to only one scene in the finished film. In fact the film has very little aliens shown on screen and the ones depicted on the poster are basically actors with faces painted green.

Another fact about the Terrornauts is that it is only available on VHS and for anybody thinking of splashing out. Don’t bother it’s not worth it.

Tuesday, 25 January 2011

FleshEater (1988)

Now come on you must know Bill Hinzman? No? The graveyard ghoul from Night of the Living Dead (1968)? Ahhh now you know who I mean! Well it seems that this claim to fame was enough for him to launch his own Zombie epic entitled Flesh Eater with him as the main character... and the director.

Saturday, 15 January 2011

A Tribute to Andrew Keir (1926- 1997)

Horror has so many good actors that will never get as much recognition as they deserve. It’s a sad fact but often it can be down to the number of films they made or that they were not particularly fond of being in horror films. What I want to do is every now and then pay tribute to an actor or actress that has been largely forgotten by the horror community. It may be on a particular anniversary or event or it may not (such as todays). The aim however (whatever the date) is to just shine some light on horror stars who gave some fantastic performances back in their day but are mostly forgotten.

Born on 3rd of April 1926 Scottish born actor Andrew Keir began acting by chance. Born into a family of miners he too took up that same occupation, he only got into acting when a friend convinced him to take over a minor role in an amateur dramatics production. He soon became a regular in the group’s performances due to his enjoyment of the role.

His talent was eventually spotted during the Second World War meaning that he could not leave his occupation as a miner. When he was diagnosed with pneumoconiosis he was finally able to take up the opportunity to become a professional actor at the unity theatre before breaking into film and television.

As Quatermass in Quatermass and the Pit (1967)

His horror roles were mostly for Hammer bar one or two his first being the vampire hunting monk Father Sandor in Dracula: Prince of Darkness (1966). Certainly one of the most memorable Vampire hunters aside from Van Helsing, Keir brought a grim determination to the role and the scene where he disposes of Barbara Shelly's Vampire is one of the most Haunting in the entire film.

His next role is easily his most well known and without a doubt my own personal favourite in one of my all time favourite horror films. It is of course his portrayal of Professor Bernard Quatermass in Quatermass and the Pit (1967). His portrayal of the professor is hailed by many to be the best of the lot and he is easily the best thing in the whole film. Keir's acting is extremely convincing especially during the final scenes and it’s a real treat to watch him play what he later admitted was one of his favourite roles.

A similar part came for him in 1971 when he took over from Peter Cushing on Blood From The Mummy’s Tomb. “Michael Carreras rang me one Friday night to say that they were in trouble. Peter Cushing’s wife had died. Could I help them out, Come in and do it? I told them to leave the script at the gate and I’d come down. I was living in Wales so I travelled overnight, learned the script and started on Monday...” Being dropped into a film at such short notice would not doubt some lesser skilled actors but Keir took it all in his stride, making an otherwise dull film worth a look.

Blood From The Mummy's Tomb (1971)

Apart from a bit part in The Night Visitor (1971) and a part in a Late Night Horror episode Keir made no other televised or film Journeys into the Genre. In 1996 however he reprised his most famous role on radio with The Quatermass Memoirs. The next year he passed away in hospital aged 71. As long as Hammer is remembered then so will Keir as he remains one of their greatest actors.

Friday, 7 January 2011

Frankenstein's Bloody Terror (1968)

Paul Naschy has often been called the Spanish Lon Chaney and not without reason. He’s played everything from the Devil himself to an Exorcist (you can’t get more opposite than that). His most famous character however is the Werewolf Waldamier Daninskey, whom he played twelve times. In fact Mr Naschy holds the record for playing a werewolf on screen the most . This was the first of those films and it may shock less knowing readers to discover that despite the film’s title there isn’t a Frankenstein in sight. It’s got a Wolfman and Vampires but no big green bloke with bolts in his neck. The title arose after distributors had been promised a Frankenstein film by independent internationals Sam Sherman but had for various reasons been let down. He quickly slapped a ridiculous prologue to the beginning of this film.